Situation:
I have done thirty-three WHOLE laps around the sun. Today is a big day, not just because it’s my birthday or my Jesus year, but because I finally put my blog out here for the world to see. This year, it was my birthday gift to myself to share this blog and be accountable to myself. For the first time my yearly reflections are going to be here (It’ll be cool to see the growth over the years). This blog is on my vision board and it’s coming to life. Pac said it best: “Reality is wrong. Dreams are for real.”
Observation:
So let’s get into this list. This past year has provided me with so many lessons, but the top 5 are here.
1. Life is Cyclical
Whew chile! Year 33 was full of some serious wins, but also some devastating blows. Know that you will have some great experiences in life. It’s what we do this thing for. But just as sure as you are bound to receive blessings, you are also sure to have disappointments. This year seemed like the Hulk ride at Universal Studios, it started off with a surprise blast and then an immediate drop and twist, then a series of more loops and falls. Although I feel like this ride is slowing down, I know the ride will start up again. And that’s not a bad thing. Have you ever noticed that if you ride the same rollercoaster for a second time, it’s not as bad and you stomach it better? That’s life. Which leads to point #2.
2. How You Wait Matters
Because I’ve been dealt some crazy blows before, weathering the storms of this year weren’t so bad. Life hits different when you’ve lived a little longer. J and I both realized that we were so chill during some situations that would have made us frantic and all kinds of dramatic previously. Everyone has heard Fred Hammond and John P. Kee sing about waiting on the Lord, but the truth is you have to do more than just wait. What the lyrics don’t talk about is the fact that you have to wait patiently (remember cyclical). In the times when you feel most lonely, vulnerable or just can’t figure it out, be patient and prayerful, expecting positive things to happen to you. Why? Because the next turn of the ride is climbing to the top again. Psalm 27:14 NLT says it best.
3. You Can’t Do Life Alone
Bruh! Sis! Let me tell you, sometimes you stumble upon a pearl of wisdom because you don’t have a choice. This was one of those things. So many blows came at once that I was literally looking like Boo Boo the Fool. You may be thinking you’re doing fine solo dolo and don’t need the people around you. Spoiler Alert!! YOU ARE NOT. If you think you don’t have a tribe, you’re also wrong. I learned this year that not only did I have a tribe, but I have riders and they even drive when they need to. I didn’t realize that when I was collecting friends as I was easin’ on down road that they would be the people I needed when the Wiz was a bust. Jokes aside, you have people praying for you, cheering for you and encouraging whether you realize it or not. On the flip side, you’ll realize not everyone around you is really for you (and that’s ok too… they’re not part of your tribe. Knowing whom those people are is important too, but that’s another post for another day). I had to put my pride to the side, be vulnerable and ask for/accept the help. You know what else? I got real rest when I needed it. To my Tribe: YOU DA BEST!
ONE MORE THING!! Sometimes you need help outside of your core group and prayer. While your friends are there for you; there is only so much you can unload on them. Be mindful of that and respect the fact that they have lives too. Giving them your baggage decreases their capacity to sew into you because they are carrying your weight too. Get you a journal, therapist, counselor or some combination of all three to unpack some of your stuff. We did that this year and it has been awesome.
4. Mindfulness is Key
You still with me??? I hope so. This one is serious business. This point affected so many aspects of how I live. Whatever your goals are, you have to be mindful of how you’ll get there. I had so many “ah-ha” moments when I actually took time to reflect on what was going on in that particular area of my life. The result? Stuff magically started happening. I started seeing results because I was paying CLOSE attention (like really close). Being mindful of the cyclical nature of life and patiently waiting, you can weather uncertainty because you’ve minimized the number of moving parts. Trust me when I tell you this: praying daily, making a budget, calling someone who’s on your mind, purging regularly, setting a deadline and creating a schedule are some of the best things you can do for yourself.
5. Be Accountable to You
Last, but certainly not least, you have to win from within and that starts with doing what you said you would do for YOU. I am really big on being a woman of my word. If I commit to something, I make it my business to not back out because it helps my credibility with others. But I realized that I wasn’t always the most credible with myself. I asked myself how I got to the point where subconsciously it was ok to not show up for me. The very next day, I started by holding myself accountable for things I had dropped the ball on (including this blog). As I started being more reflective of the things I had planned for myself and actually took legitimate action, some of the guilt that came along with helping others started to fall off. Let that sink in.
Actionable Items:
- Start reflecting on what you’re learning during your current rotation around the sun.
- Write down some of those reflections and see what they look like a year from now.
- Share what you learn within your sphere of influence so you can sharpen someone else’s iron. (Feel free to leave a comment below so that I can learn from you too!)
Piece of Ryce:
Life is going to happen not matter what. Personal growth and introspection are optional. I had a year full of the joy of motivating others, the grief of loss of ones that encouraged me and the relief of knowing that when I’m not strong, my God and my people are. It’s my hope that some or all of these points resonate with you and inspire you to dream. It’s my prayer that you have a peace that surpasses all understanding and that you find the essence of who you are and ball outta control. On this 34th lap, I may understand these five things in greater detail or have another set of realizations to share or even a new set of dreams. Either way, I’m watching, waiting and willing to learn.
I’m currently smiling from ear to ear because I’m really doing this!
Melanie says
Love this!
Ryce E says
Thanks Mel!
Tricia says
Smile bright Ryce! Well done! Love it!
Ryce E says
Thank you! I can’t wait to see your launch and what you have to share with the world.
Tiffanie says
Yayyyy!! So excited for you! I’m working to start holding myself accountable to ME! Thanks for the motivation to actually get started!
Ryce E says
Thanks Tiffanie! You’re going to be great. I’m excited to see what you have in store.
Dan Williams says
Great read. Sprinkled with golden nuggets I’ll put into my daily starting TODAY!
Ryce E says
Thank you. I Love You! I’m proud of you for starting right away.
Alexandra says
Wow girl. This was all so important and inspiring. I have definitely realized that in going through some similar situations, I have been handling them much more matured than I have before. I also screen shotted the actionable items. Congrats on the blog reboot and happy birthday!
Ryce E says
Alexandra, thank you for the kind words. When you get a chance, send me pearls of wisdom to share!
CLARISSA WILLIAMS says
Love…love… love 💗💗 proud of u Roomie 😘
Ryce E says
Thank you Rissa!
Pearl says
Yassss!!! Keep it coming sis!
My favorite take away:
“Trust me when I tell you this: praying daily, making a budget, calling someone who’s on your mind, purging regularly, setting a deadline and creating a schedule are some of the best things you can do for yourself.”
Ryce E says
Thank you Lizzie! New post coming soon! XOXO!
Janay says
Wow!!! This is so true! Thanks for the insightful post. Very inspirational.
Ryce E says
Thanks Nay! I appreciate your feedback!
JaLesia says
Yaaaaas honey!
Ryce E says
Thanks Jelly boo!